Scientology was invented by L. Ron Hubbard who started out as a science fiction writer. He said writing for a penny a word is ridiculous. If a man wanted to make a million dollars, he'd start his own religion. Among the basic tenets of Scientology are the beliefs that human beings are immortal, that a person's life experience transcends a single lifetime, and that human beings possess infinite capabilities. At the core of Scientology is a belief that each human has a reactive mind that responds to life's traumas, clouding the analytic mind and keeping us from experiencing reality. An Engram is basically a psychic scar and is the origin of illness. Life according to Scientology is all about ridding yourself of engrams by following a path of enlightenment, the Bridge To Total Freedom, and at each stage of the bridge, you are audited by a senior church member, who connects you to some electronic device called an Electronic Psychometer. It is not painful in the least. After you go through all the stages, you become an Operating Thetan. OT's as they are called are said to be able to communicate with animals, move inanimate objects, and leave their bodies at will. It's been claimed that OTs are immortal. Most Scientologist believe that brother L. Ron Hubbard will return. Much like Jesus Christ. Scientologist also believe that 75 million years ago, an evil galactic warlord by the name of Xenu, dumped 13 trillion aliens from different planets into the Earth's volcanoes (using highly modified 707 jets with rockets) and then vaporized them with H-Bombs. And the radioactive souls of these poor vaporized alien creatures, continue to enter into our bodies implanting engrams and false ideas into us, such as Christ, and God and psychiatry. This is why we have to purge ourselves of all these engrams. When one releases an engram, the erasure is usually accompanied by a yawn, or tears, sweat, odor, panting, urine, vomiting, and other things. Basically, everytime you piss, puke, fart, blow your nose or crap, you're one step closer to immortality. By taking all of the classes the Church of Scientology offers, Scientologists believe that one can reclaim his true thetan form, become closer to God (or the Supreme Being), and unlock abilities to control life, matter, energy, space, and time that have been repressed by being in human form. As Bill Burr once said, “at least scientology has spaceships” Oh space aliens are weird but eating and drinking the blood of the undead zombie savior on a Sunday isn't? A part of Scientology’s ethics system is a type of auditing known as a Confessional. Man has long postulated a means by which he could put himself on the right path. As long ago as 500 B.C., religions recognized that confession frees a person spiritually from the burden of sin. In Scientology, it has been found that a Confessional assists the person who has transgressed against their own and their group’s moral code to unburden themselves and again feel good about themselves and be a contributing member of the group. No man who is not himself honest can be free - he is his own trap. When his own deeds cannot be disclosed then he is a prisoner; he must withhold himself from his fellows and is a slave to his own conscience.

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