|One day, I was reading this dusty old book.
It's called the Bible.
I'm having difficulty getting past the first line.
If there is a single sentence in the bible that needs a little more clarity, this is the winning entry.
(It was not a
The creation story and it's aftermath makes me think that god woke up from a billion year hangover, and was like, "Shit! That thing is due in a week"
Doesn't go into any details.
Please note that as soon as you accept the concept of a god, any god, you are in the Looney Tunes Land in a dark corner of the Twilight Zone. You may notice that a god is never actually defined. A god merely is and always has been..
Now you are free to add new creatures and events into your story, like nice gardens, talking serpents, a man made from dust, a woman made from a rib, a cherubin with flaming swords, etc....
|Curse||4004 BC, 10 days after creation|
|Noah's Flood||2348 BC|
|Tower of Babel||2242 BC|
|Egypt begins||After 2242 but prior to Abraham going to Egypt|
|Call of Abraham||1922 BC|
|Ice Age Peak||1848 BC|
|Time of the Judges (Moses)||1481 BC|
|Time of the Kings (Saul)||1095 BC|
|Split kingdom||975 BC|
|Christ was born||5 BC|
In the Beginning, BigBang created the heavens and the earth.
And the universe was without form, and void, except for a hot, dense mass.
And BigBang said, let there be quarks and electrons... and there were quarks and electrons. This was the first day.
And BigBang said, let there be protons and neutrons, and there were protons and neutrons. This was the second day.
And BigBang said, let there be atomic nuclei, and there were atomic nuclei. This was the third day.
And BigBang said, let there be electrons orbiting the nuclei, and it was so, and there were atoms. This was the fourth day.
And BigBang said, let there be helium and hydrogen, and there were helium and hydrogen. This was the fifth day.
And BigBang said, let there be supernovae, and there were supernovae. This was the sixth day.
And on the seventh day, BigBang rested and saw that it was good.
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